OVERHEARD

A woman looking at a birthday card and asking her boyfriend his opinion. This was in an overpriced London shop selling greetings cards and candles - NOT the natural habitat of the British male...

- "What about this one?"
- "It doesn't matter. I don't care. I don't even like her."

MISREAD IN A BAR

It was late; I was tired. The sign appeared to say:
"On sale here: a selection of beer, urine and spirits".

Admittedly there's not always a great deal of difference...